Monday, 22 January 2018

Guilt

I'm not sure what's going on with my sleep but I'm not sleeping at all and it's really getting to me. I'm waking every couple hours and even when I do sleep it's not deeply enough because come the next morning I'm exhausted. All I want to do is sleep but it's just not happening for me.

I also had plans to do nothing which didn't happen. Cousin needed a ride to work. I had to run a few errands for Nan and I also took J over to see her Poppa soo it was a busy than what I'd like to have had day.

Weigh in day today and I'm happy to report I'm down 1.4kgs which brings me 9.3kgs closer to my first goal weight so I'm super happy about that. I've been fasting a minimum of 20 hours which I'm finding okay. I don't get hungry and I don't feel like I'm over eating when it comes to opening my window. What I am finding though is that I probably need a shorter eating window. I'm going to stick with 20 hours for now and possibly look at changing it up in a few weeks.

Today I had every intention of getting out for a walk. I had planned to go this morning but I was tired so planned to go later in the evening. On top of the no sleep my body has been achy sore. Not specifically from the walking but I think a mix of everything that it's really getting to me. I said I'd go after dinner but M said I needed to take a break before I injured myself. I felt guilty for taking a break because I felt like I'd had a break when I went to hospital. I was wrong. M told me off and said that wasn't a break it was surgery. As guilty as I was feeling I took the break and didn't head out for my walk. It was sad not seeing green but I knew M was right. I needed the break.

Hoping to get out tomorrow. Whether or not that happens is always like I say.. a different story. Haha.

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